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Joke of the Day

"Everything I like is either: illegal, immoral, fattening, addictive, expensive, or impossible"

"What do you call a hula hoop with a nail on the inside? A Navel Destroyer."

"The Nintendo 64 turned 18 today Now you can legally blow the cartridges."

"Why does Caitlyn Jenner feel like her kids see though her? I guess she is trans parent now Edit: *through"

"I hate Masseuses They're always talking behind my back"

"What is the difference between a sock and a camera? A sock takes five toes and a camera takes photos."

"Michael J. Fox He's really just trying to master The Force."

"Dropping your keys standing over a grate and them not going through is God reminding you that he could fucking kill you if he felt like it."

"COMMENCE ANNIHILATI... Sorry, wrong notes, that's tomorrow's speech. Here's the right one: You have nothing to fear from Project Omega ..."

"One of the band members of Chumbawumba were in a bar fight... He got knocked down, but he got up again."