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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a dressmaker and a farmer? A dressmaker sews what she gathers a farmer gathers what he sows."

"If cats could text you back, they wouldn't."

"I sold my vacuum cleaner on ebay........ It was just sat in the corner collecting dust....."

"What is a Canadian's Favorite Game? Sorry!"

"Tell me more about how you don't have to work out often because you get too strong too fast. Man what a predicament"

"Easy IQ Test: starting from 160, subtract 10 points for each honk of a car alarm before the owner can figure out how to turn it off."

"How do you kill an Argentinian? Take him to the top of his ego and throw him off."

"To all my haters. First of all, you should know that I'm typing this with my middle finger."

"Why can I never be a doctor? Because I don't have any patients"

"Most famous gay couple of all. Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick."