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Joke of the Day

"How my girlfriend stay's thin. Wanna know how my girlfriend stays thin? She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions."

"Goodbye, Class! Hello, Trump."

"My epileptic son loves our new Christmas tree. You should see how excited he gets when we turn on the lights."

"What does the fox say? Go republicans!"

"What's the difference between a penalty shot in basketball, and a tiny curly wig designed for a bug? One is a free throw, and the other is a flea 'fro."

"What kind of overalls does Mario wear? Denim denim denim"

"Have you ever hit a man with glasses? No. A 2by4 works much better."

"My ten year-old daughter is learning Chinese characters in school, so she can pick out a really good lower-back tattoo when she gets older"

"Some guy was reported to have gone crazy in a public bathroom. I guess you could say he lost his shit."

"I was making fun of some sodium chloride and ended up being charged with aggravating a salt."