98507

Joke of the Day

"So I took a bite of a Hoagie that wasn't mine... Oops wrong sub."

"How Many Business Analysts Does It Take To Change A Light Bulb? None. The light bulb shall never burn out. (OK. It's more cathartic than funny...)"

"I took my wife to see the doctor today hoping to sort out her tourettes problem. It turns out she doesn't have it... I am a bastard and she really does want me to f**k off..."

"Thanks, Santa! I totally wanted a hangover!"

"In actuality, Batman is just a more violent and dark version of Inspector Gadget."

"Are we sure that Oscar Pistorius was the only one involved in the murder of his girlfriend? Someone else may well have done the leg work."

"I was looking for the sun at night, and then it dawned on me."

"Why did the little girl bury her flashlight? Her batteries were dead."

"INTERVIEWER: Why do you want to work here? ME: *crumbs tumbling from my mouth* Oh, I don't. I was just walking by and saw you had donuts."

"Wife: ""I saw a huge owl on my way home. Almost hit it with my car."" Me: ""Wow!"" Wife: ""Sorry, the correct response is 'O RLY?'"""