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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Nazi doctor that served in WWII and only took animal patients? A Veteran Aryan Veterinarian!"

"What did the pirate say when he turned 80? AYE MATEY!"

"So I was watching Fox News the other day"

"[creation] GOD: You will each have a flaw BAT: I am blind SNAKE: I am deaf DOG: My breath is a little bad"

"Finally time for Donald Trump to.. Finally time for Donald Trump to have his long-pending anus transplant. He really needs to stop shitting from his mouth now."

"Behind Every Successful man. Teacher: Behind every successful man there is a women what do we learn from this? Student: we should stop wasting time in studies and find a woman."

"it's fun to yell CHEESE! at a group of girls and watch them switch to their Facebook Poses"

"I am eternally grateful that Twitter doesn't have an ""is online now"" indicator"

"What idiot called them swordfish instead of... oh, no, wait, actually that's pretty good."

"So I talked to a prostitute that was a prophet today... She told me that I would succeed. EDIT: A religion flair?"