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Joke of the Day
"I miss the things we shared together. Not the chlamydia but the rest of the stuff was cool."
Next Joke
"I don't trust any person who hasn't memorized the fuck out of Bohemian Rhapsody."
"What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Wipes his butt"
"Men are like frogs, the most important thing is to jump on faster."
"My poetry brings all the hipsters to the yard and they're like ""How Avant-garde"""
"What's the difference between a black man and batman? Batman can go into a store without Robin!"
"What's the difference between Michael Jackson and pimples? Pimples will wait till you're 14 to come on you're face."
"The toilet paper at work is rolled in improper underhand fashion. Should I call maintenance or hold it until I get home?"
"My body is telling me to go to sleep but my brain knows that there are Oreos in the pantry."
"Tower: Shamu two-two please state estimated time of arrival. Pilot: Ok let's see... I think Tuesday would be nice..."