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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Michael Jackson and pimples? Pimples will wait till you're 14 to come on you're face."

"What do sailors eat for breakfast? Naval oranges"

"When my friends say I'm too rational, I tell them to go 01100110 01110101 01100011 01101011 themselves."

"Dear Abby, My pastor insists that being gay is wrong, yet he ends all his letters with the words ""In Him"" Help! Perplexed in Poughkeepsie"

"it's better to give than to receive Especially, if it's anal."

"There is this new awesome technology to do group chats... It's called ""put your damn phone away and join the conversation!"""

"I need ideas for April fools day pranks to play on my SO"

"Why do you want your lawyer to be a U2 fan? Cos they're always pro-Bono"

"Me: Heeeeyyyyyy Judy, good morning! *scratches Judy's back, wiping off my Cheeto fingers* Judy: Hi!!! How are y..... Me: *walks away*"

"Does He Bite Reggie: We have got a new dog. Would you like to come around and play with him? Ron: Well, I don't know---does he bite? Reggie: That's what I want to find out."