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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between pizza and your opinion? I only asked for pizza."

"My wife and I are working on our marriage. She's more attentive to my needs and I've mostly stopped telling other women I'm a single father."

"Q: What do you call the Association of Blood Donors? A: The IV League."

"Alcohol is like photoshop for reality."

"Why is Kim Jong-un so bad? He has no Seoul"

"There is this guy that hates taking a poop. But shit happens."

"My mom likes to play a version of 20 Questions called 500 Really Stupid Questions."

"Not the best joke, but i did make it up myself. Q: Why can you not hook two CD-ROM drives together to create a CD Writer? A: Because two ROMs don't make a Write."

"What is the darkest / dirtiest joke you have ever heard???"

"My wife's idea of oral sex is to sit down and talk me out of it."