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Joke of the Day

"Helen Keller I pushed Helen Keller into a ditch in the middle of the woods, she screamed and screamed until her hands hurt."

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"If Reincarnation ends up being real... Those People who got ""YOLO"" tattoos are going to look... Pretty Silly"
"Ghetto wet floor sign: Caution, b*tches be trippin..."
"What do Nazis drink for breakfast? Orange Jews."
"""That'll be $19.94."" *pulls out $50 bill* ""Sorry, we've had a problem with counterfeit bills. Have anything smaller?"" *pulls out $25 bill*"
"GOOD COP: I hate crime! BAD COP: I lost my gun. BRAD COP: Check out my abs."
"What I say: Get dressed Brush teeth Get in the car What my kids hear: Have a snack Shriek like monkeys Open 3 umbrellas indoors Go poop"
"Why was 6 afraid of 7?? Because 7 had Ebola."
"What do you cal a man with no arms and no legs fighting with his cat? Claude"
"Chelsea asks Hilary to dinner 100k for a meet-and-greet, 250 to say hello and 400,000 for dinner."