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Joke of the Day

"Helen Keller I pushed Helen Keller into a ditch in the middle of the woods, she screamed and screamed until her hands hurt."

"If Reincarnation ends up being real... Those People who got ""YOLO"" tattoos are going to look... Pretty Silly"

"Ghetto wet floor sign: Caution, b*tches be trippin..."

"What do Nazis drink for breakfast? Orange Jews."

"""That'll be $19.94."" *pulls out $50 bill* ""Sorry, we've had a problem with counterfeit bills. Have anything smaller?"" *pulls out $25 bill*"

"GOOD COP: I hate crime! BAD COP: I lost my gun. BRAD COP: Check out my abs."

"What I say: Get dressed Brush teeth Get in the car What my kids hear: Have a snack Shriek like monkeys Open 3 umbrellas indoors Go poop"

"Why was 6 afraid of 7?? Because 7 had Ebola."

"What do you cal a man with no arms and no legs fighting with his cat? Claude"

"Chelsea asks Hilary to dinner 100k for a meet-and-greet, 250 to say hello and 400,000 for dinner."