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Joke of the Day

"What do Nazis drink for breakfast? Orange Jews."

"Women are like parking spaces... Sometimes all the good ones are taken, so you have to stick it in a disabled one."

"Why was the marsupial wrongly convicted? He was tried in a kangaroo court."

"Why did the computer freeze? It got frostbyte."

"[pours a bag of sugar over a tire fire] hmmm [tastes remnants] i think i'll call it... Twizzlers"

"I only trust people that like big butts. ...they can not lie."

"How many moths does it take to screw in a light bulb? ...2, but how'd they get in there."

"[Exchanging gifts at family's house] *family opens up my gifts -uh, a history book? Your Facebook post suggested that you needed it."

"""I'm really good in bed"" -Ice cream"

"Why did the baker have so many customers? He desperately kneaded the dough!"