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Joke of the Day

"When I see a black guy in a suit I high five him & say ""Innocent until proven guilty MOTHA FUCKAA!!!"" Bc he probably just came from court."

"The only time my wife will ever scream ""DEEPER, DEEPER"" is when they are lowering my casket into the ground"

"Just set my alarm for 6AM. This is going to be hilarious if it actually works."

"Two men were chatting in a bar ""So what do you do?"" ""I write"" ""Oh, poetry or prose?"" ""Neither, I write cartoons"" ""Why's that?"" ""No rhyme or reason"""

"Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the P is silent!"

"Why can't you take a pig out on a date? Because she will squeal on you."

"A guy kept telling his girlfriend not to turn her head away near the end of a blow job...... Did she listen ? Nope..... it went in one ear and out the other"

"If you steal a clean slate, does it go on your record?"

"What do you call a fat person with hemophilia? Diableedes"

"On which side do you drive? American: Right-side. Britisher: Left-side Indian: Depends on which side the oncoming traffic is."