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Joke of the Day

"Two men were chatting in a bar ""So what do you do?"" ""I write"" ""Oh, poetry or prose?"" ""Neither, I write cartoons"" ""Why's that?"" ""No rhyme or reason"""

"I wish people were more like dogs and you could just give them those three little pats and they'd know our interaction was over."

"With all the news about Bristol Palin's pregnancy, I can't help but think abortion may have been the right answer... Her grandmother probably regrets not having one."

"I just got married to a young woman from Thailand and she told me that a small penis is okay. I still wish she didn't have one though."

"What's better than roses on your piano Tulips on your organ"

"Why did the Hawaiian Hipster burn to death? He walked on lava before it was cool."

"What does it look like when you microwave a baby? Not sure, I close my eyes when I masturbate"

"Voted class president. Assassinated."

"[sees kid hitting pinata] Me: wow he really hates horses"

"What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I got no-eye deer !"