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Joke of the Day

"Married men live longer then single men. So if you want a slow death...... ;-)"

"How do you think the unthinkable? with an itheberg."

"If I were a bird, I'd spend my whole day pooping on BMWs."

"Him: Wow you're eating again? Me: Wow you're celibate again?"

"Such bullshit that people stop saying ""You ate it all! Good job!"" once you reach a certain age"

"what's 6 inches long 2 inches wide and drives a woman wild? money"

"[Job Interview] ""It says in your CV that you are quick at mathematics. What is 17 X 19?"" ""36"" ""That's not even close"" ""But it was quick"""

"Why did the Burger steal a heater? Because he was cold. Get it? ""Burr..."""

"There once was a girl named Roofie... Her blowjobs were really quite toothy. I slipped her a pill, She sucked on my dill, And ended my sexual thrill."

"These cat babies are straight up gangsta. I'm going to name them all after Friends characters. The one I hate will be Ross."