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Joke of the Day

"The Government Don't lie.. Don't cheat. Dont steal. Don't sell drugs. Don't kill. The Government Hates Competition"

"Did you hear about the girl who was dating the guy with the wooden leg? She broke it off"

"1. that's not a pregnancy test, and 2. you're pissing on my flash drive"

"I just learned that you can get drunk from Kangaroo meat! I'm pretty sure it has something to do with all the hops."

"Why do women close their eyes during sex? They don't want to see men having a good time"

"Right now the parents of the kid who climbed Trump Tower are thinking ""Damn I knew we shouldn't have given him that REI gift card"""

"Trump won because The Office went off the air in 2013, depriving liberals of their connection to Scranton."

"If I ever move to Nazareth I'm going to open a cheese shop. It'll be called Cheeses of Nazareth."

"Houston, we have a problem Houston: new phone who dis"

"I've always wanted to be the best dead person ever But the competition is stiff."