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Joke of the Day

"Me: Would you have a minute to speak about my lord and savior, nachos supreme? Her: Sir, for the last time just tell me your order."

"Based on my family's hatred for vegetables and always throwing them in the garbage, I hope I'm never in a coma."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. I don't know what they did up there, but they came back with a daughter."

"In St. Louis right now, thought this was appropriate: How many black people does it take to start a riot? -1"

"Toads and choads What do toads and choads have in common? They both taste a bit swampy"

"... and on the eighth day, Satan created teenagers."

"What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit Hole? A Hot Cross Bunny"

"You say a mesquito bit you and now you have the chills, a high fever and are sweating profusely? That's not funny. That's malarious!"

"A gun and a bullet get into a heated argument Police still don't know who fired the first shot"

"[1st moon landing] Mission Ctrl: Be sure to say something important & profound Neil: Ok *steps onto moon* Neil: *clears throat* I'm a vegan"