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Joke of the Day

"I log in facebook to see that everyone is at the bar... I go to the bar to see that everyone is on facebook."

"How does Lil Wayne get inspiration for his new music? He listens to his old music."

"How many Tourette's sufferers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fuck you god damn shit cunt just one of us asshole bitch bastard!"

"There's this app on my phone that makes me look ugly. It's called ""Camera."""

"A schooner, a clipper and a junk sail into a bar, All hands lost."

"Why suicidal people are usually skinny because most likely, they haven't eaten in years."

"HA! [That's close enough.](http://windows.microsoft.com/en-us/internet-explorer/downloads/ie-9/worldwide-languages)"

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? [NSFW] You can't jelly your cock into a baby's ass"

"What is a horse being when it says mean thinga It's being neigh-gitive! Edit: Awesome. Screwed up the title"

"I imagine the hardest part about being vegan is getting up before sunrise to milk all of those almonds."