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Joke of the Day

"Actual Mechanical Advantage(AMA)"

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"I beat my girlfriend at dominos the other night. She needs to learn that *I* choose the pizza toppings."
"Watched the new Star Wars movie at an outdoor theater..... Watched the new Star Wars movie at an outdoor theater after dusk. It was a Jedi night."
"What is a pirate's favorite element in the periodic table? Gold. Why the fuck would a pirate need Argon?"
"Why are Astronauts seen as condescending? Because all they do is look down at people."
"I like my women like I like my peanut butter Chunky."
"AIR & SEX Q: Why is air a lot like sex? A: Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any."
"What's Tom Brady's favorite type of chip? Cheat-Ohs!"
"Why does Helen Keller masturbate with only 1 hand? because she is moaning with the other."
"I was going to cover my bathroom floor with dead baby skin... My wife told be that would be infant tile."