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Joke of the Day

"Want to know how to make tons of people mad real fast? your about to now how."

"kid doctor: [looking over charts] im not going to lie this is the worst case of cooties ive ever seen little girl: he said he'd been tested!"

"A Pirate walks into a Bar A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel on his belt buckle. The bartender says ""what's that on your belt buckle?"" Pirate says ""Arrr, it's drivin' me nuts!"""

"My Mother texted me and asked ""What does TTYL mean?""... I replied, ""Talk to you later"". So she responded, ""No! Talk to me now! What does it mean?"""

"Joan Rivers stopped breathing during cosmetic surgery and has passed after several days of home care. At least she died doing what she loved."

"Vermont's 4 seasons Vermont has 5 seasons: Almost winter Winter Still winter Mud season Road construction"

"Hey guys, Racism is a crime But crime is only for black people"

"Life milestone: when your iPhone stops autocorrecting ""fuck"" to ""duck."""

"Why did the kangaroo love the little Australian bear? Because the bear had many fine koala-ties!"

"Me: Push! Grandkids: But, you're heavy. Me: What did the sign say? Grandkids: No children in shopping cart :(( Me: Rules are rules."