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Joke of the Day

"did you hear the one about the arguing grandfather clocks? one chimed in and other tocked over him. also they were both racists"

"Buying a new phone is basically being forced into a not so fun game of ""how long can I go without dropping it."" Same thing with babies."

"What does a dog become after it 6 years old? Seven years old."

"""Ma'am, you had twins. They are fine and your boyfriend Chad named them"" - Oh no ""This is Debra"" - aww I like that ""And this is Depanties"""

"A man was recently arrested For having sex with a van. You can say he's... vansexual."

"I was going to make a joke about the midwest... ...but it was too corny"

"How do you know an angle is dead? When it shows no vital sines"

"Some people are like Slinkies... Some people are like Slinkies. Not really good for anything, but they can still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs."

"My girlfriend. ..probably tells me a lot that I don't listen to her."

"George Bush and his son like to refer to each other as ""41"" and ""43."" I don't know why they'd be so proud of IQ's that low."