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Joke of the Day

"what is worse than locking your keys in your car parked at planned parent hood? going inside to borrow a coat hanger"

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Tree Hugger Barbie ...pull the string and she spouts environmentalist rhetoric"

"Why does Puff Daddy have nice hair? Because Sean Combs."

"Why do the French like Cheap Trick? Because they always surrender!"

"Just read that California leads the nation in depression cases and adultery. What a sad state of affairs."

"How many nihilists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? #"

"I am racist. fuck NASCAR."

"Santa has elves. America has China."

"Did you hear about the kid who brought a home made watch to school? He had a real bad time..."

"It was my first time getting laid 5 minutes ago I'm hoping to hatch soon."