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Joke of the Day

"My nickname is Gilette because I'm the best a man can get. Also, I will cut you"

"What function do the bumps on a nipple serve? Its brail for, ""Suck This."""

"A colleague of mine fell into a vat of chemicals. Ironically, his quick reaction killed him."

"Tip for new parents: The less you feed 'em, the less they poop."

"(NSFW) I was eating pussy when... I tasted horse semen. It was only then that I realized how my sister had died."

"What do you call a Mustard that keeps remembering things that haven't happened yet? dijon-vu mustard... (Sorry)"

"""Uno, dos..."" And just like that, the Spanish magician was gone without a tres."

"How do you tittie fuck a flat chested chick? Froggy style. Ribbit ribbit"

"Why did the Mexican girl get pregnant? Her teacher told her to do an essay."

"[police interrogation] ""What do you do for a living?"" ""Drug dealer."" ""Louder, for the tape."" [leans in] ""Bug healer. I heal bugs."""