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Joke of the Day
"Why would a dead girl lie? Because she can't stand up."
Next Joke
"What do Yoda's sheep say? Dey go baa."
"If your band's name is a plural & it doesn't have a ""the"" in front of it, I will fucking put one there."
"Don't let... ...an extra chromosome get you down."
"What do you call a three legged cow? Lean Beef. What do you call a two legged cow? Your mom."
"I run an amateur dramatic society. Someone approached me recently wanting to do an all dwarf version of the pantomime ""Aladdin"". The concept is a little wishy-washy."
"Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes."
"You should never trust a person as far as you can throw them. Needless to say, I trust the fuck out of babies."
"A little boy walks into a bar... he is treated for minor concussions... it's funny cause he's a minor, laugh"
"""Jesus loves you."" A good thing to hear in church but a terrifying thing to hear in a mexican prison."