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Joke of the Day

"The difference between Sean Connery and a Silica Tetrahedron One's an ionic bond, the other's an iconic Bond."

"What's a gangsta say when a house falls on him? Get off me, homes!"

"Welcome to hipster fights. You can ironically hang your scarves over there. There's PBR and tacos in the food truck. Don't enjoy yourself."

"Chicken Pot Pie sounds like a delicious 3 course meal."

"What do you call a flesh light powered by your smartphone? iFap"

"Do Asian Golf Crowds Ohhhh And Awwwww Better Than American Fans?"

"So I just preordered a Jet Black IPhone.. Lol jk"

"Girl can I ask you a question *gets down on one knee* would you like to make $8,000 a week working from home"

"I think cheese gets sweaty because it's hard sitting around being delicious."

"If sleep is the cousin of death, then nap-kins are at least relatives."