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Joke of the Day

"The difference between Sean Connery and a Silica Tetrahedron One's an ionic bond, the other's an iconic Bond."

"Maybe I'll starting bringing a spray bottle and treat them like misbehaving cats. ""NO!"" *Shoots person in face*"

"Before I got divorced, I should have converted all my assets to jokes. Because my ex couldn't ever take one."

"So did you hear about the guy who didn't finish his jokes?"

"I have decided to run a marathon and have taken up vaping instead of smoking You could say I am running on fumes."

"Mom, why am I black? - Mom, why are you, dad and everyone else in the family white, and I'm black? - The party was so crazy you should be happy you don't bark."

"IRISH EATS ITALIAN Q: What does an Irishman get after eating Italian food? A: Gaelic breath."

"What do you call a dead baby ,who fights crime? Miscarriage of Justice"

"I'm going to hell in so many different religions."

"I think this lady I'm stalking just found out. She changed her wifi name to: ""Hey you in the tree. I've called the cops."""