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Joke of the Day

"I wouldn't say I'm emotionally needy, but I do set the thermostat real low so my cat has to huddle with me for warmth."

"Back when I was a kid we stared at the wall when we took a shit and we liked it!"

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay $39 to have a garbanzo bean on my chest."

"Ddi Humpty Dumpty have a good winter? No, but he had a great Fall."

"What did the groundhog's trainer tell him before the Olympics? Gopher gold."

"My cousin posted a meme in family group chat and my aunt said ""maybe this is the year you find a husband like the way you find good jokes"" "

"Jim Apple finds introducing himself very problematic when holidaying in France."

"I need your parent's phone number so I can call you & hang up when they answer. Cause if I'm gonna crush on you, I'm doing it old school."

"Did you hear? Broadway is making a theatrical production on puns! It's going to be a *huge* play on words!"

"What do you call a surfer who loves Muhammad? A radicalized Muslim braaaaaaaaaaaaaa"