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Joke of the Day

"I'd participate in more blind taste tests if they didn't always scream & hit me with their canes while I'm licking them."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Brian ! Brian who ? Brian drain !"

"What do farts and children have in common? You love your own, but hate everyone else's."

"I swear I am not racist I have nothing against them, actually I think every white person should have one! I'm sorry"

"If I could have dinner with anybody living or dead, I would choose someone who is dead so I didn't have to listen to them chew."

"I'm not taking the Democrat convention seriously until someone starts talking to a table."

"[Justice League HQ] SUPERMAN: Looks like Batman is hungry tonight MOTHMAN: [visibly sweating] I think I'll just fight daytime crimes"

"Two atoms are walking down the street.... Two atoms walking down the street. One says, ""Damn, Ive lost an electron"". ""Are you sure?"" ""Yep, I'm positive""."

"the logic of why the line in front of this bathroom is so long if pee, then queue"

"I live for the nods pedestrians give when you stop to let them cross."