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Joke of the Day

"Send me one more game request and I'm showing up at your house hammered, at 4am, naked and demanding a game of Twister..."

"Envelope containing poop. Sorry for the shit post."

"My Internet was out for a while so I went downstairs to talk to my mom. She seems nice."

"I like my coffee like I like my women... Ground fine and stored in the freezer to maximize the freshness. Oh man this is awful. Don't kill me."

"What's the difference between Davey Crockett and Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels is still killing Indians."

"Brushed the fur off my couch and made another cat."

"My wife just bought toilet paper from Costco which is great because later today we're having 3,000 people over to take a shit."

"What's the useless skin around the vagina called? The woman."

"I didn't like my beard at first.. Then it started to grow on me"

"Sometimes you need a little distance to see things clearly, but other times it is obviously a bear and you should probably just run"