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Joke of the Day

"What's the matter son? The boy next door said I look just like you? What did you say? Nothing he's bigger than me !"

"Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks, ""You want fries with that"" because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't ever want fries with anything. Ever."

"Hotel guest to desk clerk: ""I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled."" Desk clerk: ""No, it's regular porn you sick fuck."""

"Does Chewbacca use body wash or just shampoo and conditioner?"

"What animal spins around about 200 times after it dies? A rotisserie chicken"

"I was gonna put on my cowboy hat and sit on my patio shirtless to showcase my abs when I realized I don't own a cowboy hat, a patio, or abs."

"How do u know if a company that just hired you conducts drug tests? What is the likelihood it will be a hairtest"

"People with amblyopia don't have a lazy eye... they have an eye with ADHD."

"""Omelet you finish,"" -Kanyegg West"

"How can you tell if there's a mosquito in your bed? By the ""M"" on his pajamas."