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Joke of the Day

"Why was George Washington buried on Mount Vernon? Because he was dead!"

"I'm so tired I could eat a horse."

"What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back."

"How do you communicate with a fish? Drop him a line."

"I like my girlfriend's new glow-in-the-dark braces... ...her smile really lights up the room now."

"Why do babies cry so much? YOU'RE MOM."

"Oh my god, hotels. Relax. My stay was fine."

"Why do stoners love couches? Because of their 'cush'ions!"

"Been doing a lot of gay clubbing recently The baby seals put up less of a fight though..."

"I'm interested in this girl who only dates Catholic guys... ... I guess you could call me a pope-less romantic"