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Joke of the Day
"Deez Nutz He really has it in the bag."
Next Joke
"I bought a grandfather clock. It's like a regular clock but it keeps telling you that it's lived through three wars."
"are u in love with me? no?? *slides u a chocolate pudding* how about now?"
"The Longest joke in the world (sorry if re-post) it's totally worth it! [7 Page Joke](http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2a5xwx/truthmafia.com/archives/1554)"
"*job interview* ""Youre 30? Why haven't you accomplished your life goals?"" ""Tbh I thought the Mayan apocalypse was real. No plan past that."""
"Nine out of ten doctors suggest you drink water instead of soda. The one that doesn't lives in Flint, Michigan."
"A Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
"They say statistically, 1 out of every 3 of your neighbors are likely to be a pedophile. Luckily for me, I live next to two gorgeous 12 year olds."
"I'm in a 12 step program for musical theatre addicts. I'm on step 5, 6, 7, and!"
"""When I was younger they all laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian,"" said Dane Cook. ""Nobody's laughing now!"""