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Joke of the Day

"I bought a high end stereo with a broken volume knob for $10. I couldn't turn it down."

"Rabbits... Rabbits bang like there's no fucking tomorrow."

"[Ariel climbs Rapunzel's hair with a dinglehopper between her teeth] ""There can only be one socially awkward Princess,"" she vows savagely."

"Pamela Anderson What do you call the space between Pamela Anderson's breasts? Answer: Silicon Valley. Just heard this one today and wanted to share. Don't know if this is gonna be a repost."

"Before we hang out, please be advised I will be spending the rest of the summer talking like Bane."

"It Turns out Trump was right about 1 thing... Never send a woman to do a man's job! Bernie 2020!"

"Why was the snake soft? He had reptile dysfunction."

"Are you seeing someone? Me: Are you seeing someone? Girl: Um, no. Me: Not even a psychiatrist?"

"Why was the Windows PC broke? It ran out of cache."

"I caught my girl cheating with my best friend on my new leather couch... Of course I yelled at him.. He's not allowed on the couch. (Made this one up this morning.. Still playing with the wording)"