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Joke of the Day

"When you write lyrics as bad as ""I got soul but I'm not a soldier"" it's important to repeat it exactly 10 times in a row so nobody misses it"

"French Army That's it. That's the joke."

"I use words like ""acquiesce"" and ""ubiquitous"" in daily conversation and then I throw in a ""for reals yo"" just to stay mysterious."

"Did you hear about the community pool they built in the bronx? There were no survivors."

"[to a straight couple] Which one is the lesbian and which one is the other lesbian"

"A cop pulled me over because he thought I was talking on a cell phone but really I was just rubbing a slice of pizza on the side of my face"

"I take it personally when I let a car cut in front of me and then they immediately get into another lane. Come back you are with me now."

"How did you get out of Iraq? Iran"

"Where do Cows go for parties? The Moovies"

"Yo mama so stupid she tried to put her m&ms; in alphabetical order."