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Joke of the Day

"if eren jaeger is a teenager and he's also a titan wouldn't that make him a.... *teen titan* http://imgur.com/R6lGaGL"

"Some people like instant gratification but I prefer mine brewed slowly from freshly ground gratification beans"

"A Man Has a Heart Attack on a Plane... Stewardess: Is **anybody** here a doctor?! Man: (Raising Hand) I'm a vegan."

"They told me I would miss my family. I never miss at close range."

"A man knocked on my door and asked for a donation toward the local swimming pool So I gave him a glass of water."

"[quickly jumps into the back of a cab] ME: How far will this get me? *i hand the driver 14 peanut m&ms with the chocolate sucked off*"

"What is R. Kelly's favorite group to feature? Black Guy Pees."

"Russian Chukcha Joke Chukcha approaches his friend whose sitting on an empty mile long bench. Move over, says Chukcha."

"What part of a vegetable is the hardest to eat? The wheelchair."

"what idiot named it erectile dysfunction instead of ballzheimer's"