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Joke of the Day
"How do you spot a egocentric vocalist? They warm up singing, 'Mi, mi, mi.... Mi!'"
Next Joke
"I'm not saying don't trust the internet, but there's an alarming discrepancy in the number of Ipads I've won & the number of Ipads I own."
"Why accountants don't read novels? Because the only numbers in them are page numbers."
"Few things in life are more pleasurable than turning off the lights in a public bathroom while people are still inside.."
"What do you call a forty something guy who masturbates all the time? Married"
"Why did the blonde pull the dildo out before she came? She wasn't on the pill"
"I woke up today with a blowjob... that's the last time I fall asleep on a train with my mouth open"
"You're worried about rats in the walls? How is that any of your business? When was the last time you went inside your own walls?"
"Wife: I'm hungry! Me: I'll order pizza Wife: YOU THINK I'M FAT! Me: *whispering* Has it been 28 days already? Wife: WHAT?! Me: what what??"
"What's the difference between Hitler and Michael Phelps? Phelps can finish a race"