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Joke of the Day

"The best part of being single is being able to sleep around... You get to sleep all over your bed. Left, right, diagonal, or in the middle."

"The best part about being a comma is that you're usually followed by a nice big BUT."

"What's the difference between people in Dubai and people in Abu Dhabi? People in Dubai don't watch the Flinstones, but people in Abu Dhabi do."

"My friend asked me if I had a blast on my birthday. I told him I had such a blast, ISIS would have been proud!"

"Why has the pope never won a gold medal? Because he always came in a little behind."

"Pee Wee Herman got arrested for masturbating in public. That very same day, Chuck Norris received an award for masturbating in public."

"What's the difference between Jelly and Jam? I can't jelly my cock up your ass"

"The world seems like a beautiful place until you realize that there isn't one thing that hasn't been shoved up a butt."

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl use a urinal? Because the p is silent."

"What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, agnostic and an insomniac? A person who stays up all night contemplating the existence of dog."