92071

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked ON the moon, and Michael Jackson had sex with kids."

"My girlfriend agreed to give me a blowjob Oral consent"

"I'm on the bus now. Either the woman sitting right next to me has two really ugly children, or two seriously cool Pokemons."

"You can't fix stupid but you can fantasize about slapping the shit out of it."

"Oatmeal shouldn't get to have the word ""meal"" in it. How about oatsnack? Or oatbullshit?"

"Have you seen that new film about a tractor? Me neither, just saw the trailer."

"*dinosaur at zoo roars at me* ""ROAR"" whoa wat kimd of dinosaur is this ""GROWL"" hmm ""SHOUT"" hmmm ""YELL"" hmmmmm ""HOLLER"" oh its a thesaurus"""

"Why did the White Man go to the Moon? He wanted more land. -Heard this from a native friend of mine. I laughed my ass off."

"It's like squirrels don't even know how good they'd be at parkour."