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Joke of the Day

"I lost my new underwear... ...I only wore them briefly."

"What food greatly diminishes a women's sex drive? Wedding cake"

"It's weird how many of my ancestors were sepia-toned."

"I have good taste, but I don't have the money to prove it."

"A deaf couple decide they want to break up... Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: They went their separate ways and never heard from eachother again."

"What's the difference between George W. Bush and Hitler? Hitler was an evil *genius*."

"What did Harry Potter say when his waiter gave him the wrong drink? ""Sir, when I buy patron I EXPECTO PATRONUM!"" (Hauls ass towards the exit)"

"My grandpappy didn't come here from Norway so a black president could let immigrants park their low-riders in front of my liquor store!"

"My friend said he was going to become a mime I haven't heard from him in a while"

"Quick tax question: Does giving thousands of dollars to charity last year make up for lying about it this year?"