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Joke of the Day

"I never got why nice guys don't get all the girls... I mean they do finish last, I thought girls liked that."

"What app do you use to browse Reddit on your phone? 9gag"

"Do you know how Jewish birds chirp? Cheap, cheap, cheap, cheap!"

"I started professionally playing the rubber band as an instrument... ...I consider myself a one-man band."

"Why do cows think cooks are mean? They whip cream!"

"Look , it's either maybe, or maybe not. There's no middle ground."

"-So how can we help you today Mr Benson? ""Please. Mr Benson was my father."" -Alright. So how can we help you today Mr Bensonson?"

"Headaches aren't real.. They're all in your head."

"As soon as I can go a full year without losing a pair of sunglasses, then maybe I'll be ready to take care of a kid."

"What did the ghost say to the bee? Boobee!"