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Joke of the Day
"I went to the zoo - it only had one animal, a small dog. It was a shitsu"
Next Joke
"2 eggs were on a frying pan One of them says: ""Gee, it's really hot in here!"" The other egg says: ""HOLY CRAP, A TALKING EGG!"""
"I have a new low score on the Wells Fargo game I downloaded on my iPhone."
"They say that when you find a spider in Australia... you hear boss battle music."
"What's worse than being a tanning salon owner in Africa? Being a Somali Uber driver in Columbus, Ohio."
"How many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? A lot, because they're fucking stupid."
"Yesterday I took LSD and I wrestled with a grass snake for three hours. On a side note, our garden hose is completely wrecked."
"How does Snoop Dogg keep his shirts so white? BLE-YATCH!"
"What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Corduroy!"
"Am I crazy... ... or does it smell like boogers in here?"