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Joke of the Day
"Today I saw a girl wearing camouflage pants. They didn't show her ass very well."
Next Joke
"Me: What do you want for breakfast? Kids: EGGS! BACON! WAFFLES! CHOCOLATE CHIP PANCAKES! Me: Let me rephrase. Who wants toast?"
"What's worse than giving Willie Nelson a blow job? Finding out it's not Willie Nelson"
"If a group of necrophiliacs ran into group of zombies...who would do the chasing? Oh, I went there...;)"
"What's Gordon Ramsey's favorite movie? ITS FUCKING [removed]"
"When I was young I wanted to date a doctor for money. Can you believe how superficial I was?!? Now I would date him for the prescriptions."
"Who do grammar nazis hang out with now? The alt-write."
"My son feels about broccoli the way I feel about having to make a phone call."
"The Three Laws of Secure Computing 1) Don't buy a computer. 2) If you do buy a computer don't plug it in. 3) If you do plug it in sell it and return to step 1."
"""I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'"""