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Joke of the Day
"Hey, did you hear about that hilarious joke on /r/Jokes? Neither did I."
Next Joke
"A blind man walks into a bar.. And a table. And a chair."
"We all know by now that when someone says, ""I'm sorry, I never got that text,"" they ABSOLUTELY got that text, right?"
"Wondering why my jokes aren't being upvoted. All of my employees laugh at my jokes, so I'm obviously a funny guy."
"What do you call a Spanish matador who is not very good at his job? I'd say he's fairly incapa**bull**."
"What do Batman films and religious farms have in common? They may have a Christian Bale in them."
"..so in a technical sense, they're only relatively bad. My jokes are so bad, they sometimes appear to violate causality.."
"Why Can't you hear a Pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the P is Silent!"
"What is the difference between michael jackson,and neil armstrong... neil armstrong was the first man to walk on the MOON,and michael jackson likes to fuck little boys in the ass."
"When I die, just throw the laundry in my grave with me. I want to die exactly as I lived."