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Joke of the Day
"Yo mama so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!"
Next Joke
"Speed 3: Waitress has to keep talking about the day's specials or the entire restaurant explodes."
"ALFRED: *wringing out wet birthday party invitation* it's difficult to read, but i'd hazard a guess at aquaman, master wayne"
"I just thought of a great joke!! https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/48lziv/hey_guys_i_invented_a_new_word/"
"Confucius Say . . . Man who run in front of car get tired. Man who run behind car get exhausted. Stabbing a man with a spoon is pointless."
"What's the tallest building in your city? The library, because it has the most stories."
"Swallow it dammit, it's good for you Your Pride"
"What did the the Jamaican daddy spice say to his son when he was being bad? Your a cinnamon"
"Intellectual. A man who can explain electricity but doesn't know how to screw in a light bulb."
"Not only is my new thesaurus terrible, But it's also terrible."