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Joke of the Day

"What's long and hard on a black guy? A math test."

"Just heard a 15 year old call an autobiography a word selfie *points finger gun at mouth* *pulls trigger*"

"What is the most expensive type of prostitute? Whoreganic"

"This creepy guy at work calls me ""hun"" despite knowing my real name so I've started calling him Mulan."

"Joint Facebook accounts are the couples sitting on the same side of the booth of the internet."

"I'm not flirting with you. I'm just nice. Get over yourself. Except you. You get under me."

"JUDY: What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus? MIKE: We'll have a boo Christmas without you."

"When you see a girl who was hot in high school, but a decade later she's not https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6-RfZDiayDI"

"[At microphone] *clears throat* ""Salsa. Ballet. Conga. Waltz. Jitterbug. Tap."" *crowd cheers* ""Thanks for attending my dance recital."""

"A Mexican Magician Performs a Trick He tells the audience he can disappear into thin air on the count of three. He says ""uno""... ""dos""... *poof* He disappeared without a ""tres""."