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Joke of the Day

"What does L in Samuel L. Jackson stand for? Motherfucker. (from somewhere in YouTube comments)"

"I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust."

"Just been informed the man who stole my journal has died. My thoughts are with his family."

"What's the difference between me and a calendar? the 14th of february the calendar will have a date."

"[WOLF CUB] Dad, why do we howl at the moon? [WOLF DAD] Well son, the moon is made of cheese and that's rad as hell"

"Watched the new Star Wars movie at an outdoor theater..... Watched the new Star Wars movie at an outdoor theater after dusk. It was a Jedi night."

"What is Trumps favorite movie? Minority Report."

"A single gene that is dramatically different in chimpanzees and humans may explain why apes cannot talk. Oh well, at least they can still communicate through rap music."

"2017 Resolution: spend more quality time with my son *son begins describing his 500 new Pokemon cards* Well, there's always next year"

"The Difference Between Starkiller Base and The Death Star Starkiller base doesn't have a reactor core because it is a copyright of the fine bros."