89839

Joke of the Day

"[presentation] GUY WITH A COMBOVER NAMED IAN: So that's our plan for the next year. Any questions? ME: Why did you call your combover Ian?"

"What do you call empathetic bovine? understand bull"

"Came home and my wife was having sex with some guy in our bed. I confronted her, she denied everything, but I know our bed when I see it."

"It's too bad that everyone who has a solution for everything is at home commenting on the internet."

"What do Asians do when they have an erection? They vote."

"This girl told me that she wouldn't sleep with me if I was the last person on Earth. If I was the last person on Earth, she wouldn't have a choice in the matter."

"You're a vegetarian who eats fish? I guess that makes sense since bears are basically vegetarians."

"A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it."

"How did we build a tunnel to china? A jew found a dollar in a hole."

"UK Scientist: We've engineered a new species of cyanobacteria U.S. scientist: We've made pigs in a blanket 50% piggier"