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Joke of the Day
"How did the handyman feel after going to the bar? He was hammered."
Next Joke
"[being robbed] Me: careful.. I'm ARMED *whips out bible Robber: lol *pulls gun out of bible R: oh *pulls smaller bible out of gun"
"two fish So there were two fish in a tank. The one fish looked at the other and said ""Hey buddy do you know how to drive this thing?"""
"My local police stations toilet was stolen.... The cops have nothing to go on."
"No. RT @BarackObama: Is the song ""Piano Man"" about a guy who is actually part piano, like a monster?"
"pranking neighborhood teens by pulling my car into their driveway & putting a bow on it so they think their parents bought it for them"
"I just ordered a chicken and an egg off Amazon.... I want to see which one comes first."
"What does a blonde and a shotgun have in common? You break them at the middle and load them from behind"
"What's the difference between 3 dicks and a joke ? Your mom can't take a joke."
"Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it."