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Joke of the Day

"I got an idea for a 90's Mustard Commercial joke but I need some help, so let me ask properly. Pardon Me, but do you have any Grey Poop Puns?"

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"We are thinking about making chili for Christmas Eve. We're starting a new tradition called 'silent but deadly night'."
"Why is Wrestling similar to porn? because it's fun to watch when you're younger... but you get depressed when you're told it's fake."
"Hindsight is $20.20. Don't even ask me what she charged to see her boobs."
"What do you call a one-legged asian woman? Irene"
"[x-post from askreddit] Aside from throwing stones, what should a person living in a glass house not do?"
"Girlfriend My girlfriend said she wanted me to tease her. I said, 'Alright, fatty.'"
"How did the private eye use math to find the intent of the crime? He solved for y! Thought this one up myself and thought it was post worthy"
"My doctor told me to start killing people. Well not in those exact words. He said I had to reduce the stress in my life. Same thing."
"*Girl comes out in a slinky dress* ME: Ooh that looks like fun *I push her down the stairs*"