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Joke of the Day
"Mother Teresa walks into a bar"
Next Joke
"Meditation is fun when you want to do nothing for an hour but still feel a sense of accomplishment."
"Man with a drippy dick. What did the man with a drippy dick say before he went to the bathroom? I'll be back in three shakes."
"I like the idea of almond milk, but then I can't get the image out of my head of someone milking a nut."
"Teen: Your brows are on fleek! Me: (confused) Yeah well your FACE is on fleek. Teen: Thanks! Me: God damn it."
"I used to pay out of pocket for Viagra... it was hard for a long time"
"A pedophile chicken has sex with an egg... Obviously the chicken came first."
"I really wish every time I insulted someone, you suddenly hear that ""Oooohhh"" the audience does in sitcom shows."
"Just bought a sandwich at the airport so gonna have to put off buying a house for a while."
"Senior high school picture...they weren't ready http://www.today.com/news/teen-comes-out-closet-hilarious-senior-quote-t25881?cid=par-huffpost-gravity"