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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a white person wearing glasses while playing Yu-Gi-Oh? Four eyes white dragon. ^sorry if repost, thought of this myself."

"Asked my toddler if she'd work on being more careful when eating in her car seat. Her response was an immediate ""No."" At least she's honest."

"Life is like a box of chocolates, The good ones are always gone before I get there!"

"I'm going to create a social network called ""Selfies And Drama"" also known as ""S.A.D."" @MaleHonesty86"

"Ground control to Kerbal III, how willing would you be to share your proximity to the equator? We have zero inclination."

"The eyes are the window to the soul which is why I'm throwing pebbles at your face."

"Me: *stumbles in front of boss at work* Boss: haha have a nice trip, see you in the fall Me: *takes 8 month vacation*"

"Have you ever smelled moth balls? Oh, you have? How'd you get between their tiny little legs?"

"If I had a jet pack I would look AWESOME dying within the first 2 minutes of having a jet pack."

"What's the difference between Karate and Judo? Karate is a martial art and Judo is used to make bagels."