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Joke of the Day

"You should never bribe someone to get what you want. You should blackmail them, it's cheaper and much more effective."

"I went to the zoo the other day, all they had was a small dog. It was a shit-zoo."

"Why haven't you introduced me to your followers yet? Are you ashamed of me?"

"What do you get when you cross a nymphomaniac with a kleptomaniac? A fucking thief!"

"He said he would call me at 5pm but didn't until 5.03pm. His lies will tear our relationship apart"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Candace ! Candace who ? Candace with love !"

"Why did the black man cross the road? To catch the chicken (Btw I came up with this myself)"

"What did the leper say to the prostitute? keep the tip"

"Did you know darth veder got married His wife is elevator Terrible joke I know"

"I have that eating disorder where I threw up once cause I ate too much candy and now I nod knowingly when someone says they're bulimic."