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Joke of the Day

"I'm really starting to regret dating a dentist... she's always asking me to talk about about my fillings."

"Rumors. Well at least you're spreading something else besides your legs."

"""Are you even listening to me?"" is a weird way for my girlfriend to start a conversation."

"What do you call a group of homosexual musicians from India who never get to play out? A Gay Raj band"

"""I don't understand why people try to act drunk. I spend most of my time trying to act sober."" - Florida State"

"I'm convinced some of you are here because someone didn't properly lock your cage."

"GUY (whose car died): can u help me? I need a jump ME (pulling a trampoline out of my trunk): im always prepared for emergencies like this"

"A man walks into a zoo. The only animal there is a dog. It is a shih tzu."

"Why did the Siamese twins move to England? So the one on the right could drive for a change."

"Just got seen around town doing modern guy stuff like leaning on things, holding my phone & staring disapprovingly at nothing in particular."